


one degree

by selvish



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Childhood Friends, Clay | Dream is Bad at Feelings (Video Blogging RPF), M/M, Reunions, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-12 19:47:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29764674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/selvish/pseuds/selvish
Summary: He's not sure what to say, now that they're here. George being friends with both him and Sapnap since high school means he technically knows everything that happened between them, assuming Sapnap filled him in when Dream locked himself up. What he can't stop thinking about is that he's never asked how the youngest has been."Can you... Can you tell me about him?"The look on George’s face is a mixed bag. There's a little bit of surprise, a little bit of sadness, and a lot of worry. He takes another sip of his tea and thinks about his answer.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream/Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 21
Kudos: 112





	one degree

**Author's Note:**

> baby's first dreamnap, i hope it's good!
> 
> remember to ship privately, do not send this to ccs or mention it in donos, please!
> 
> enjoy <3

There is an idea, a phenomenon if you will, that each human being is six degrees of separation from any other human being on Earth. For many people this is a comfort, to think and fantasize about being a mere six introductions from anyone you like. Six friend-of-a-friend's from your celebrity crush or a generous billionaire. It gives people just enough hope that the deeply intertwined web of humankind can be navigated to achieve anything you could ever want. However, those people forget that you can meet the most heart-wrenching, life-altering people as well. 

You never really know when you meet someone like that. It sneaks up on you. Dream spent his early teen years surrounded by so much love and light, he was too blinded by it to see the oncoming storm. He thinks, in his weaker moments, of the stark contrast between ages 15 and 21. How he could have had anyone with the charm and popularity he was blessed with; how he chose someone who destined him for loneliness instead. 

In reality, in the daylight, he is able to see through the fog. The people he's kept close through the years are still kind, still fun. He tells himself he doesn't need the storm of yearning and heartbreak, and goes home to count the degrees separating him and Sapnap. 

1) Him to George

2) George to Sapnap 

One, two, one, two. 

It used to be different, him and Sapnap were tied together as a package. From early morning to late afternoon they biked around town at breakneck speeds, sporting matching scraped knees the next day at school. At night, they stayed up until 2am doing homework, then 4am just talking. Dream knew him like the back of his hand. On his bad days the voice in his head that got him out of bed was the other boy whispering "If you make me face Biology alone, I'll key your dad's car." 

So good, so exciting, so tantalizingly perfect. Every day was a goddamn movie scene, it made him sick. Dream sleeps through the sickness. Dream needs to get out of bed. 

He does. He gets out of bed and makes his way to his kitchen to make coffee. In all honesty, he's not a big fan of coffee, but these days he needs an extra push to get out of the house. 

His phone buzzes as he plugs it into the wall socket by the oven. Dream watches with distant interest as notifications pour in from last night. He had gone to bed pretty early, so people were apparently wondering where he'd been. 

From behind him comes a scrubbing noise, and he turns to see George coming out of the bathroom, brushing his teeth and levelling him with a judgemental stare. 

"Why are you here?" Dream asks, as if he wasn't the one to give George a key to his apartment. He must have come by late last night to be here when Dream woke up. 

"Dog walk." George responds through the foam in his mouth. The brunette holds his gaze before going back into the bathroom sink and spitting. Dream makes a grossed out face at the sound and pours coffee into a mug from the pot, holding the face at the smell. 

Him and George made the arrangement three years ago, when everything fell apart. Dream was infatuated with self sabotage and staying at home, while George wanted to get back into shape. They agreed to go for runs together. George called them dog walks just to make Dream feel bad about it, and it worked. 

Dream groans at the idea of running today. All of his bones feel weary and achy, and his daily tension headache is blooming at the top of his neck. He chugs the coffee and gags at the taste when he drains the mug, then cleans it at the sink and heads back to his room to change. 

He realizes he has no idea what the weather is doing outside, but thankfully Florida is pretty predictable month by month. Thinking for a moment, he realizes it's March, and it suddenly makes sense why George stayed over. Every year, as time inches closer to Sapnap's birthday, he goes a little bit more mental than usual. Dream shakes his head and takes a breath, getting dressed and returning to the kitchen where George waits. 

"Don't forget your phone." George says as the blonde heads straight for the door. 

"It needs to charge. I don't want music today, anyway." He says flatly. 

George licks his teeth, looking bothered. That's not abnormal for him, though, so Dream continues walking out the door and waits for him to follow. 

They get outside and stretch. The sun feels good on Dream's skin, and as he pops his knuckles and eases his muscles into movement, he almost dares to thank George for getting him outside. He knows it'll just lead to the older man rolling his eyes or scoffing, so he keeps it to himself. 

A foot nudges his calf and he turns to look at George. He looks thoughtful. 

"You look awful." 

"I feel it." 

George inhales and nods, which Dream takes as a sign to start moving. He leads the run, while George follows and kicks his ankles when he starts to slow down. 

Foolishly, he sets a brutal pace, and he knows George is smiling behind him as the first kick lands just above his shoe. Despite the headache lingering, he lets himself smile too. It feels good to move, and it feels good to be with someone. He allows himself to feel good, his plagued thoughts resting on the back burner as the runner's high pumps into his body. 

They run for about 45 minutes, a couple miles into town, before Dream gives up. He turns off of the sidewalk and collapses in a heap at the outskirts of a park. His body rolls in the grass, and he's panting heavily as he catches his breath. Above him, George stands bent over with his hands on his knees. 

"That bad, huh?" George asks him while looking at the ground. He spits, and Dream wheezes. 

"Yeah, George, that fucking bad." He scrubs his hands over his face, finally feeling his heart rate go back to normal. "I don't think I can pretend that I'm fine with the way my life is going anymore." 

It's more honest than George was expecting, and to Dream's surprise, he's looking at him with a soft expression. 

"Are you ready to talk about it? 

Dream swallows, looking up at the big puffy clouds and feeling the sweat that coats his lower back. "I think I am." 

He doesn't say  _ 'thank god' _ ,  _ 'finally' _ , or anything like that. George just walks over and offers him a hand to help him up. 

"Then let's talk." 

The schools they go to are on opposite sides of town from each other. Dream is still in undergrad, after taking a gap year post-high school. He's inching his way towards a Bachelor's in marketing while George undertakes grad school for computer science. They're about halfway between both campuses at the moment, so they head to the coffee shop nearby where they've spent many afternoons cramming and catching up. 

In the corner by the window is their favourite table, and Dream sits down while George goes to the cashier to order. It's nice inside, the air conditioning cooling his overheated body. He's secretly grateful this spot is more tucked away, since he obviously couldn't shower before coming in. George returns with a tea for himself and a bagel for Dream, always one step ahead for what the blonde needs. 

"You didn't eat anything this morning." George says around his first sip. Dream scratches the back of his neck with one and picks up the bagel with the other, taking a bite so he won't admit he didn't eat last night either. 

"Thanks." 

George nods and relaxes back into his chair, assuming they'll be here a while. Dream chews his food slowly as he gathers his thoughts. He's not sure what to say, now that they're here. George being friends with both him and Sapnap since high school means he technically knows everything that happened between them, assuming Sapnap filled him in when Dream locked himself up. What he can't stop thinking about is that he's never asked how the youngest has been. 

"Can you... Can you tell me about him?" 

The look on George’s face is a mixed bag. There's a little bit of surprise, a little bit of sadness, and a lot of worry. He takes another sip of his tea and thinks about his answer. 

"He's good." Dream exhales shakily, then urges George to continue. "He came back to Florida for Sophomore year. He's at a school about 2 hours North of here." 

"Jacksonville." 

"Yes." George pauses, waiting to see if Dream says anything else. He doesn't, just looks out the window. "He, um, he was dating someone for about a year at his old school, an older guy named Karl. They broke up kind of messily so he moved back to get away from it. He's working a lot, picked up an internship alongside school at some local tech company his dad has connections to. Uh, let's see..." 

Something isn't being said, it's hanging in the air between them and Dream looks back at George to press him about it. The brunette is visibly uncomfortable. 

"George. Just tell me." 

George groans in that long-suffering way he does sometimes. 

"What do you want me to say, Dream? You know what's going on. You're both miserably in love with each other. Always have been, always will be." He rolls his eyes when Dream tries to interject. "Don't be stupid, you've been hiding from this for 3 years, and I'm tired of playing the part of World's Most Patient Messenger Pigeon. You miss him because even though you weren't ready to love him back then, you won't be able to love anyone else, let alone your dreary self, until you  _ try _ with him. You are each other's worlds; past, present, and future. I know it's scary, but you can't keep pretending that's not what's in the cards for you two." 

Three years ago, before going away to college further up the East Coast, Sapnap kissed him. He took them on a drive in the truck his parents bought him to the beach after dusk. They ran on the sand shooting off fireworks, and when they had no more left they stood in the water to watch the sunrise over the waves. Sapnap turned to him, took his face in his hands and kissed him. Dream didn't kiss back, just stood there as every interaction of the last 6 years was fogged over with want. Every touch and whisper and harmless flirt crashed into him and he froze up. 

Sapnap pulled away, searching his dumbstruck face for reciprocation, and when he found none, he left. 

He left Dream stranded to walk home, too angry at the rejection for anything else. Dream didn't know what to do, so he did nothing. Then Sapnap left him for North Carolina and they didn't speak again. It was so easy to push it all away and let it die, never let himself think about how he felt. He could work it away, take in enough caffeine to get him through jobs and school and busy himself so he never got the chance to wonder what would have happened if he kissed back. 

George is handing him the opportunity on a silver platter. He eyes it. He takes it. 

"I miss him so much, George."

Dream leans his elbows onto his knees, folding his hands on the back of his neck and lets himself feel the sadness. The loneliness of losing his best friend and being without him by his own fault soaks beneath his skin, and he can feel tears building in his eyes. George reaches over and rests one of his hands on Dream’s head.

“Tell him. Please.”

“Why would he take me back, though? Why would he ever give me a second chance when it’s been so long?” Dream gets out before clearing his throat, willing himself not to cry in public.

“Because he misses you just as much.”

It settles around him like a blanket, the idea that Sapnap could still think of him, could still  _ want  _ him after what he’s done. George takes his hand away, and he sits up again with a deep breath.

“Can you give me his number?”

George smiles and nods, pulling out his phone and sending the information over to Dream via text. Dream pats his pockets before remembering he left his phone at home. He settles back into his chair and nods a thanks to George.

“Now are you going to ask how  _ I’m _ doing? Or do we just talk about you now?” George says with a teasing smile, bringing his tea to his lips as Dream laughs.

The rest of their time together was nice, easy, but the fact that Dream had Sapnap’s information in his phone added the tiniest spice of unease to the conversation. He wanted so badly to be there for George and care about what he was saying, but the idea that the device was waiting for him at home, a ticket to the rest of his life, taunted him.

After maybe half an hour of small talk, George gave him a knowing look and ushered him out of the coffee shop, promising to check in on him the next day.

He stretched again outside and slowly jogged home, regretting not having any music to keep his thoughts from spiralling. It was difficult to decide whether he should send a text to the other or just cold call. Would Sapnap pick up? Did he still have his number saved this whole time? Would he leave a voicemail?

Working himself up made him go faster, and soon enough he was back at his apartment, absolutely wrecked with exhaustion from all of the exercise. He forces himself to take a shower before anything else, and when he gets to the kitchen where his phone waits, he ignores all of the other notifications and saves the number George had sent him.

Dream likes to think he’s a reasonable person. Sure, he’s fallen victim to his own impulsiveness on occasion, but when it comes to big and serious things he tries to take the time to think them through. This time, however, he is weak.

The phone rings, the call connects.

“Hello?” Sapnap asks, sounding confused and a little annoyed.

“Nick, hey.” He breathes more than says. Sapnap gasps and the sound of the phone being adjusted in a tighter grip comes over the line. “It’s Clay.”

“ _ Dream _ .”

Closing his eyes, Dream smiles and sinks down onto the floor of his kitchen, settling in a sit on crossed legs. He holds the phone snug to his ear, like he can get it inside of his brain and hear Sapnap say his name from inside his body.

“Yeah, Sap, it’s me.” The tears from earlier come back and fall down his cheeks before he can think to stop them. “I’ve missed you.”

Sapnap is laughing softly, in that breathy and unbelieving way that he can’t control. Dream wants to listen to it forever.

“I miss you, too. How have you been?”

Dream swallows and takes a shaky breath so he can try to stop crying. “I… I want to talk about that. Not like this, though, I want to see you.”

“Okay, I can-”

“No, no. I’ll come to you. You’re in Jacksonville, right?” They’re going way too fast and he knows it, soaring through the awkwardness and straight into unbridled  _ eager _ that should be terrifying. They both thrive on it, always have. With the two of them there’s no room for self consciousness, no room for second guessing. “I’ll drive up tomorrow. Whenever you want.”

“Okay.” Sapnap is smiling, Dream can hear it in his voice. If he closes his eyes he can see it clear as day, like they’re in the same room despite the distance. While Sapnap is two years younger than Dream, he’s often the more mature of the two of them in moments like this. Selfishly, he lets Dream lead them into brash action, not letting himself be the voice of reason. “I’ll send you my address.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow.”

They sit on the line, listening to each other breathe. There’s no need to say anything, that’s for tomorrow. For right now they just need to be together again. In the loaded silence they’re 11, 12, 18, ageless; in the same room, two hours away. Two people stuck together from the beginning, stuck together forever.

\---

Dream is not the safest driver. In the best of times he’s been known to flirt with the speed limit, and he’s currently got his foot locked on the gas pedal, pressing down just a tad too hard for the cars around him. They’re thankfully keeping out of his way, and as long as there’s no speed traps or bored cops, he should make it to Jacksonville half an hour ahead of schedule.

Jacksonville welcomes him easily, and he slows down once he hits the busier city roads. He’s been here a few times, so it’s not too difficult to track down Sapnap’s apartment building. There’s a parking spot about 5 minutes down the road, so he hits the brakes and turns the car off, sitting and breathing with white knuckles on the steering wheel.

This is it, right? If he fucks this part up, it’s over. The high that lingered after the phone call finally ended last night has been replaced with adrenaline and anxiety, plaguing his veins with bubbly energy that he couldn’t work out no matter how much he tried to run it out this morning.

It’s clear he won’t be calming down anytime soon, so he gets out of the car and starts walking. Palm trees wave at him from roadside, and he feels his shoulders untense a little as the cool spring wind wraps around him. The apartment building is in view, so he shoots a text to Sapnap that he’s at the door. He goes up the couple steps and waits to be buzzed in. He is buzzed in.

Sapnap’s door is open, and the younger man is leaning against the frame, watching him approach with an insecure smile on his face. It’s like he’s trying to hide how excited he is, trying to hold a composure that is foreign to their interactions. Dream feels a trace of guilt go up his spine, so he smiles warmly when they meet eyes just to watch Sapnap grin wider and duck his head before turning and entering his apartment.

Inside, the air is cool with air conditioning. Beneath that artificial smell is a similar scent to the one Dream knew well from Sapnap’s childhood home. The walls are white, but have posters scattered around that warm the space up. His living room has a cozy looking couch, a hideous orange rug, and a door that must lead to Sapnap’s bedroom. Dream stands in the middle of the space and takes it all in in silence, letting it sink in that he’s here.

“Don’t say shit about the rug, it was a gift.” Sapnap says after a couple seconds, having closed the door behind him. The fact that he can still read his mind after being away from him for so long makes something twist in Dream’s chest.

“Shitty gift.” He says easily, turning back to the kitchen where he came in and looking at Sapnap with the same curious gaze he gave the room.

He looks similar to how Dream imagined he would. His hair is a little longer, face a little scruffier, still adorably shorter than Dream.

“Fuck off,” Sapnap laughs with a roll of his eyes before nodding to the couch. “Sit down. You standing there all twitchy is freaking me out.”

Dream didn’t notice his hands had been fidgeting nervously, and he would have felt embarrassed in any other company. Instead he rolls his eyes back and sits on the couch. Sapnap opens the fridge and grabs two cans of soda, coming into the living room and setting one down on the coffee table for Dream and opening his own.

“So…” Dream starts, scratching idly at his jeans, staring down the can of soda like it will tell him what to do. Sapnap is looking at him with his eyebrows raised, more amused than insecure now. It makes Dream nervous that he doesn’t seem nervous.

“George has been keeping me up to date on how you’ve been.” Sapnap says as if that tells Dream anything. “He texted me yesterday before you called that you finally asked about me. I knew you’d be reaching out, and honestly I wasn’t that surprised you decided to come up so soon. Impulsive bastard.”

Dream ducks his head down a little, laughing and wiping a hand down his face. He really is pretty predictable sometimes. He reaches out and opens the can of soda just to do something with his hands.

“Yeah, I- I really have to do everything at once, huh?” He takes a sip, sets the can back down, and finally looks at Sapnap next to him. The other isn’t sitting very close, giving him space to breathe. “I guess I got tired of my own bullshit, you know?”

Sapnap hums in response, urging him to continue with a tilt of his head.

“I just… You really blindsided me, dude.” Sapnap’s eyes get a little wide, and his posture straightens in defense. “Sorry, that came out wrong. I just don’t even know how to say it. Obviously I handled it poorly, but, like, you didn’t even give me a chance to process what was going on.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” Sapnap says, a defeated sigh coming out. “I definitely regret the way I went about it.”

Dream nods, looking away again, this time focussing on the black screen of the television across from them. “Can you just tell me what you meant? I know, like, objectively what you kissing me means.” Sapnap winces at the bluntness. “But I need to hear it to understand.”

There’s another silence, and he can hear Sapnap fiddling with the can in his hands.

“I love you, Dream. I always did. You’re my favourite person, and I didn’t know how to tell you when I was leaving, so I tried to show you. I guess it got kind of lost in translation, and then I panicked. I didn’t know what to do when you didn’t love me back. For other people, they worry about being rejected from the start, and I guess I did too, hence why it took so long for me to get the guts to do something… But, honestly, in that moment after spending that night with you, I couldn’t even fathom you not feeling the same way as I did. I kissed you because I couldn’t imagine us doing anything else right then. Then… You didn’t kiss back, and it was like the whole world was off-kilter.” Dream knows Sapnap is crying, he can hear it when he breathes, but he can’t look at him yet. “To be so sure of something, then be told no… I couldn’t handle it.”

His brain is taking in everything, filing it all neatly where it goes. Sapnap loves him, Sapnap wanted to kiss him because he thought he loved him too. Somehow he knew before Dream did that they were meant for something more, and Dream still couldn’t put together the pieces until three years later. Fucking  _ George  _ had to spell it out for him.

“I am… An idiot.” He finally says, realizing he’s crying again when he hiccups midway through the sentence. Sapnap offers a cold laugh, and Dream turns to watch him wipe his wet face. “Of course you love me, of course I love you back.”

“Thanks, man, I fucking know.” Sapnap replies, looking like he wants to smack Dream upside the head. “Thanks for catching up. I’m glad we spent three years being miserable assholes when we could have been making out on a beach instead.”

It’s so casual, it’s so  _ them _ it makes Dream chuckle. He scoots a little closer on the couch, leaning in and watching Sapnap’s gaze dart from his eyes to his lips.

“If you kissed me again.” Dream whispers, watching as Sapnap inches closer to his face. “I’d kiss you back.”

“You promise?” A flirty jut of Sapnap’s chin accompanies the words, and Dream swallows and licks his lips.

“ _ Yeah. _ ” He breathes out, inhaling sharply through his nose when Sapnap presses their lips together.

Their first kiss, now years ago, was gentle and hopeful. It was a shot in the dark fuelled by hints and overthought glances. This… This is solid. It’s real.

Sapnap’s hand lands on the side of his neck, and Dream tilts his head to deepen the kiss so he can feel the other’s grip tighten. His mouth opens and Sapnap mirrors it, lapping his tongue inside and gliding against the front of Dream’s bottom row of teeth.

He groans and presses in harder, but Sapnap pushes him back down onto the couch in retaliation. Sapnap gets up on his knees and hovers over his body, taking his free hand and lacing his fingers between Dream’s. He pins the hand to the couch and Dream moves one of his legs to wrap around his waist. His body is lanky and a little awkward, but Sapnap is sturdy and sure of himself as he kisses him.

Dream’s brain isn’t thinking anymore, just letting his body lay lax as he’s kissed into oblivion. If he was more self-aware, he’d be pissed that he was content to be without this for so long. Sapnap kissing him feels so correct, so safe, it feels like a homecoming.

“I love you.” Sapnap groans into his mouth, making Dream’s heart skip a beat.

“I love you too.” He responds, pulling his way to look at him.

Both of their faces are flushed, their lips wet and eyes heavy lidded. Sapnap smiles at him lazily, and it makes Dream gulp. He moves the hand on his neck and replaces it with his mouth, leaving tender kisses along his jugular. Dream hums, bringing one hand to rest in Sapnap’s hair.

“We have a lot of catching up to do.” The brunette says, sucking the blushing skin between his lips just long enough to make Dream moan.

“Better get started then.” Dream replies, looking up at the ceiling with a dopey smile.

**Author's Note:**

> honestly, this came about because of a bad day. sometimes i need to just take all of my sad feelings and give them to Dream to cope LMAO. i wrote the first half at work, so i hope it wasn't too scattered. the rest was churned out in one caffiene-fuelled sprint. maybe one day i'll actually write something and look over it more than once ^__^;;
> 
> remember to kudos/comment if u enjoy! it makes me so happy <3
> 
> my twitter is @_selvish if ud like to follow!


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